I hate Destiny

So as I was walking to the grocery store today (Large side note: Grocery stores suck in Paris, they have no selection or variety and have very few things on the shelves...horrible, you cannot find fresh spices anywhere. back to the story sorry) I had an epiphany.

Either I am very lucky or God really hates me. Most are going to say the latter of the two.

My quartier (neighborhood) here in Paris is known for one thing, it is the wedding dress capital of Paris. The street I live on is filled with shop after shop of cheap tuxedos and bridal gowns.

I am lucky theory: If I had a long-term girlfriend one could say this is destiny telling me something. What bigger hint could you have? But as you now know I do not have a long-term girlfriend nor have I ever, thus leading to...

God really hates me theory: God must really hate me to put me on a street where I am constantly reminded that I don't have and have never had a long-term relationship. It is a constant reminder of that fact. It is almost like a scrwany school kid walking to school that knows every time he passes a certain corner on his way to school, he will get punched in the gut by the school bully. I am that scrawny school kid.

Speaking of which I have now lost 15lbs, thus proving my theory that the best diet for any male (notice only male) is to live in Europe for awhile. For some reason every American female I have known that has lived here for awhile actually puts on weight, while every male I have known loses weight and lots of it. I once knew a professional dancer that looked like she had 3 kids and lived in a trailor park by the time she had left France.

Tip if ever visiting Paris: Avoid stepping in all liquids in the street. The only time it is okay is if you are following street cleaner....seriously trust me on this one.

Random Dream: So two nights ago I dreamt that I saw Patrick Ewing and his wife driving a small European car on the Left Bank. That was it, that was the dream.

UPDATE on drunken President Email: Come to find out that only I received this email, everyone else received the full version. This just adds credence to the theory that God really hates me. If you have read comments to the previous post you will understand this.